Tired of all that stupid 'cheer up' stuff?

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Abdul Alhazred
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Tired of all that stupid 'cheer up' stuff?

Postby Abdul Alhazred » Wed May 16, 2018 3:28 pm

'Oldest living person ever at 128' wishes she had died young and says her longevity is "a punishment"
Mirror (UK)

A woman purported to be the oldest living person ever at 128 says she hasn't lived a single happy day in her life and her longevity is "a punishment".

The Russian government claims Koku Istambulova is the world's oldest person.

But she has bluntly said her longevity "was God's will" and she "did nothing to make it happen".

While some people chalk it up to a healthy or active lifestyle, "tired" Koku said: "I have no idea how I lived until now."

Due to turn 129 in two weeks, she added: “I have not had a single happy day in my life."

The claim was made by the Pension Fund of the Russian Federation and is based on Koku's internal passport which shows her date of birth as 1 June 1889.

If correct, Koku - who shuns meat and loathes soups, but loves fermented milk - was already 27 when the last tsar, Nicholas II, was forced to abdicate in March 1917. She was 55 when the Second World War ended in 1945, and 102 when the Soviet Union collapsed a generation ago in 1991.

During the war she recalls “scary” Nazi tanks passing her family home.

She and her family were later deported along with the entire Chechen nation Kazakhstan and Siberia by Stalin who accused them of Nazi collaboration.

...
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Re: Tired of all that stupid 'cheer up' stuff?

Postby Nyarlathotep » Wed May 16, 2018 4:33 pm

At least she's honest
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Re: Tired of all that stupid 'cheer up' stuff?

Postby shemp » Thu May 17, 2018 2:33 am

Nyarlathotep wrote:At least she's honest


1. Russia is notorious for false longevity claims.
2. Internal passports and pension fund records aren't valid data to support longevity claims.
3. She's a lying cunt.
"It is not I who is mad! It is I who is crazy!" -- Ren Hoek

"[... it seems most strange that... ] the Creator of Heaven and Earth resorted to the womb of a certain Jewish lady, grew there for nine months and was born as an infant, and afterwards grew up and was betrayed into the hands of his enemies who sentenced him to death and executed him, and that afterwards... he came to life and returned to his original place. The mind of a Jew, or any other person, simply cannot tolerate these assertions. If you have listened all your life to the priests who have filled your brain and the marrow of your bones with this doctrine, and it has settled into you because of that accustomed habit. [I would argue that if you were hearing these ideas for the first time, now, as a grown adult], you would never have accepted them." -- Rabbi Moses ben Nahman, defending the Talmud at the Disputation of Barcelona, July 1263.

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Re: Tired of all that stupid 'cheer up' stuff?

Postby Anaxagoras » Thu May 17, 2018 3:37 am

Yeah, she isn't on the list so I don't believe her claim, but the list is interesting:

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/List_of_t ... est_people

It does clearly show that women really do live longer than men, for one thing. The top 15 longest-livers were all women, and only 6 of the top 100 were men (none of whom are still alive). 122 is the official record so 128 would be an extreme outlier statistically speaking (even 122 is an extreme outlier, more than 3 years longer than anyone else). Only 2 people ever made it to their 118th birthday. A lot of them seem to give out at 117 or 116 or 115.

A couple more factoids gleaned from the list: of the people who live to 114, less than half live till their 115th birthday, and likewise of those who do celebrate 115, less than half again will see their 116th. At these ages, your expected remaining lifetime, just actuarially, is measured in months or even weeks.
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Abdul Alhazred
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Re: Tired of all that stupid 'cheer up' stuff?

Postby Abdul Alhazred » Thu May 17, 2018 8:36 am

Anaxagoras wrote:Yeah, she isn't on the list ...


Wikipedia?

Easy to fix that list. :)
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