A Home For Bruce

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grayman
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A Home For Bruce

Post by grayman » Tue Jul 12, 2011 3:29 pm

GSA is offering lighthouses for sale, some for free.
For sale: Historic waterfront property with a spectacular, 50-foot-high view of Lake Michigan. Featuring solid, century-old cast-iron construction, painted distinctive red. Comes with its own Fresnel lens for signaling ships...

...As of Sunday afternoon, after several bids early Saturday, the Kenosha lighthouse price was at $13,000, while the one at Conneaut Harbor had received one bid for $5,000.
Imagine having one located on its own island with yourself the sole occupant.

Here's one that's not for sale. Just posting it 'cause it's in Nebraska:

Image
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Bruce
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Re: A Home For Bruce

Post by Bruce » Tue Jul 12, 2011 7:46 pm

Organizations interested in acquiring one of the lighthouses need to submit a letter expressing interest in the property and complete a rigorous application process.
This tells me that the GSA wants to make absolutely certain that you have a huge boner for lighthouses and intend to take good care of these important historical monuments, but......in the next sentence.......
If no suitable steward is identified, the lighthouses will be auctioned to the general public.
In otherwords, if no one comes forward with a boner for lighthouses, they go to the highest bidder, or fuck, you can just have it for free.

One day, just to get out of house for a while, I took the historial lighthouse tour in NewPort bay. It's basically a Ferry that takes you near each of the 30 historical lighthouses (or remnants thereof) in the bay. Most are faithfully maintained. Some have been converted to personal houses and barely resemble their former lighthousiness.

One lighthouse is nothing more than a rock with some bits of rubble and metal about a mile off the coast. It was completely destroyed by a giant wave in the early 1900's. It's sole occupant was in the lighthouse at the time and died.

So yeah. Living on an island by myself in a cozy little lighthouse sounds spiffy, until a nice wave comes along. I'm a lousy swimmer and I dislike drowning.

The lighthouse in Nebraska looks nice, but there are people in Nebraska. :(
Such potential!

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Re: A Home For Bruce

Post by gnome » Tue Jul 12, 2011 8:27 pm

But think of the fun you could have misdirecting ships and boats, or shining a bright light into the windows of neighbors that annoy you!
"If fighting is sure to result in victory, then you must fight! Sun Tzu said that, and I'd say he knows a little bit more about fighting than you do, pal, because he invented it, and then he perfected it so that no living man could best him in the ring of honor. Then, he used his fight money to buy two of every animal on earth, and then he herded them onto a boat, and then he beat the crap out of every single one. And from that day forward any time a bunch of animals are together in one place it's called a zoo! (Beat) Unless it's a farm!"
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Bruce
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Re: A Home For Bruce

Post by Bruce » Tue Jul 12, 2011 9:23 pm

Lighthouse gummies are awesome.

Image

......what? :|
Such potential!

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Cool Hand
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Re: A Home For Bruce

Post by Cool Hand » Tue Jul 12, 2011 11:36 pm

gnome wrote:But think of the fun you could have misdirecting ships and boats, or shining a bright light into the windows of neighbors that annoy you!
Especially all those huge ships in Nebraska!

CH
....life purpose is pay taxes -- pillory 12/05/13

And you run and you run to catch up with the sun but it's sinking
Racing around to come up behind you again
The sun is the same in a relative way, but you're older
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Re: A Home For Bruce

Post by En folkefiende » Wed Jul 13, 2011 12:38 am

Cool Hand wrote:
gnome wrote:But think of the fun you could have misdirecting ships and boats, or shining a bright light into the windows of neighbors that annoy you!
Especially all those huge ships in Nebraska!

CH
The ones next to Carhenge, you mean?

http://www.carhenge.com/
Formerly jj, the enemy of the people, aka the bullies who rant and lie here.

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Re: A Home For Bruce

Post by Anaxagoras » Wed Jul 13, 2011 11:33 am

Bruce wrote:Lighthouse gummies are awesome.

Image

......what? :|
I'm certainly in awe. :weirdeyes:
A fool thinks himself to be wise, but a wise man knows himself to be a fool.
William Shakespeare

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Bruce
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Re: A Home For Bruce

Post by Bruce » Wed Jul 13, 2011 5:36 pm

I have considered Spitsbergen, though it's a bit crowded for my taste, and I don't speak Nordic:

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Spitsbergen

It holds the Svalbard Global Seed Vault which just opened up three years ago. If there is ever a global disaster, such as spontaneous combustion of Global Warming believers, then the scattered remnants of humanity will want to head for Svalbard.

I'm considering a donation of Corn Nut seeds, just in case.

No lighthouses on Svalbard that I'm aware of. :(
Such potential!

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Re: A Home For Bruce

Post by Bruce » Wed Jul 13, 2011 5:50 pm

Image

It's like they have everything BUT Corn Nut seeds. :x
Such potential!

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Re: A Home For Bruce

Post by Bruce » Wed Jul 13, 2011 10:38 pm

Image

Seems like a nice school to put my kids in. According to this website, there are currently 6 students enrolled, ages 5 to 12. Perfect!

http://www.panoramio.com/photo/326371?s ... google.com

It's a nice little out-of-the way place called Pitcairn.

I wonder what kind of Wi-Fi they get out there? :)
Such potential!

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Re: A Home For Bruce

Post by Bruce » Wed Jul 13, 2011 10:56 pm

Then there's Tristan da Cunha
http://www.panoramio.com/photo/1723487? ... google.com

Nice place, except that Christians live there.
http://www.panoramio.com/photo/51306405 ... google.com

Therefore, I would probably be that weird guy who lives way over there on the South side of the island, just down the road.

Aw, damn. They already have one of those. :x
http://www.panoramio.com/photo/51306258 ... google.com
Such potential!

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Re: A Home For Bruce

Post by Bruce » Thu Jul 14, 2011 11:54 am

My only fear about moving to an un-inhabited remote island is that Rob Lister may one day drop a barrel of nuclear waste on my house. :(
Such potential!

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Re: A Home For Bruce

Post by Nyarlathotep » Thu Jul 14, 2011 2:19 pm

This thread is disappointing, I thought it was a discussion of putting Bruce into a home.
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Re: A Home For Bruce

Post by grayman » Thu Jul 14, 2011 9:02 pm

Nyarlathotep wrote:This thread is disappointing, I thought it was a discussion of putting Bruce into a home.
Give it time.
You will be electroplated. Resistance is potential divided by current! - Dr. Matt

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Re: A Home For Bruce

Post by Cool Hand » Fri Jul 15, 2011 12:01 am

Bruce wrote:Image

Seems like a nice school to put my kids in. According to this website, there are currently 6 students enrolled, ages 5 to 12. Perfect!

http://www.panoramio.com/photo/326371?s ... google.com

It's a nice little out-of-the way place called Pitcairn.

I wonder what kind of Wi-Fi they get out there? :)
You do realize that Christians live on Pitcairn too, right?

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Fletcher_Christian

CH
....life purpose is pay taxes -- pillory 12/05/13

And you run and you run to catch up with the sun but it's sinking
Racing around to come up behind you again
The sun is the same in a relative way, but you're older
Shorter of breath and one day closer to death.

"Time" -- Pink Floyd

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Re: A Home For Bruce

Post by Bruce » Fri Jul 15, 2011 1:35 am

Cool Hand wrote:
Bruce wrote:Image

Seems like a nice school to put my kids in. According to this website, there are currently 6 students enrolled, ages 5 to 12. Perfect!

http://www.panoramio.com/photo/326371?s ... google.com

It's a nice little out-of-the way place called Pitcairn.

I wonder what kind of Wi-Fi they get out there? :)
You do realize that Christians live on Pitcairn too, right?

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Fletcher_Christian

CH
How did Christians manage to ruin every remote corner of the planet. :poutpout:
Such potential!

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Re: A Home For Bruce

Post by Bruce » Wed Jul 27, 2011 6:13 pm

For the record, I have no plans to move to Utoeya island, or any other island near Norway for that matter. :(

Anyone know of any remote islands that haven't been soiled with the blood of Christians, Muslims, or victims thereof?
Such potential!

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Re: A Home For Bruce

Post by Bearguin » Wed Jul 27, 2011 6:26 pm

Pretty sure there are some islands off Vancouver island that haven't been.

They've been overrun by the greenies, hippys, and other left wing wackos.

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Re: A Home For Bruce

Post by DrMatt » Wed Jul 27, 2011 6:50 pm

Bruce wrote:Image

Seems like a nice school to put my kids in. According to this website, there are currently 6 students enrolled, ages 5 to 12. Perfect!

http://www.panoramio.com/photo/326371?s ... google.com

It's a nice little out-of-the way place called Pitcairn.

I wonder what kind of Wi-Fi they get out there? :)
Looks like it's ready to slide down the hill.
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Re: A Home For Bruce

Post by Cool Hand » Wed Jul 27, 2011 11:25 pm

DrMatt wrote:
Bruce wrote:Image

Seems like a nice school to put my kids in. According to this website, there are currently 6 students enrolled, ages 5 to 12. Perfect!

http://www.panoramio.com/photo/326371?s ... google.com

It's a nice little out-of-the way place called Pitcairn.

I wonder what kind of Wi-Fi they get out there? :)
Looks like it's ready to slide down the hill.
Oh no, not the slippery slope argument.

:roll:

CH
....life purpose is pay taxes -- pillory 12/05/13

And you run and you run to catch up with the sun but it's sinking
Racing around to come up behind you again
The sun is the same in a relative way, but you're older
Shorter of breath and one day closer to death.

"Time" -- Pink Floyd